I know… what a happy topic for Christmas Eve, right?
Well, the quickest way to get divorced, even after like 40 years of marriage, is to give your wife this:
One Christmas, when we were young, my Grandaddy gave my Grannie a set of tires for Christmas. (Granted, she said she needed new tires, but still… ) He brought them home and stacked them neatly in the Christmas Room (yes, they have a Christmas Room at their house… who ‘bother blog post, y’all) with a bow on top.
If Grannies could be pissed, she was. She didn’t speak to him for two days.
This was after two other automotive related near-divorce decisions, too. There was the fateful “I got a motorcycle for our 25th anniversary” debacle. And then there was the “Let’s go eat at Shoney’s with the grandkids and I’ll go next door and buy an Audi” debacle. Now tires. For Christmas.
As I remember it, she huffed and puffed around for a few days. The tires stayed stacked in the Christmas Room until she finally told him to take them to get them put on.
When he unstacked them, a small ring box fell out.
{here’s where I insert that my parents own a jewelry store}
For Christmas, my Grandaddy bought her an engagement ring.
She had never had an engagement ring in the (I’m guessing since I don’t’ remember what year this was) 40 years they’d been married, only a simple wedding band.
I imagine she didn’t squeal like a schoolgirl, but probably said, “Elmer!” in a half-mad, half-smarty-pants fashion, wanting to stay mad but being so excited about a surprise that she had to giggle.
That’s the kind of gift giver my Grandaddy was.
He’s lucky she put up with him for almost 50 years (he died in 2002) without leaving him after one of his impulsive or crazy purchases, but they were one of the most amazing couples I’ve ever been around. I know my Grannie misses him so much.
I know I do, too.